"If anyone would come after me, he must deny
himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save
his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me and for the
gospel will save it" (Mark 8:34-35)
Hello, my name is Ashley and I struggle with self-discipline. Well, maybe "struggle" is an understatement, I have no self-discipline. I do what I want when I want. I am much like Paul, I do what I shouldn't when I know what I should do (Romans 7:15). My alarm is set for 6:00 am to get up, work-out, have my quiet time and get ready for work. I'm never up before 7:45. I've tried setting my alarm to my favorite song, I've tried setting my alarm to my favorite worship song, I've tried using the alarm clock on my bookshelf. Nothing seems to help.
I'm a diabetic and have the biggest sweet tooth (I know, right!), especially when it come to breakfast foods. On the weekends I splurge and eat a sugary treat for breakfast. I've tried memorizing Romans 12:1 as a reminder to use my body as a living sacrifice and not eat such bad for me foods...hasn't really worked out for me. I'm saving for school but have been justifying shopping so that I can stock up on clothes now because I won't be able to afford anything new once my income declines. What I want, when I want it.
Mark 8:34-35 really spoke to me this morning, the phrase that caught my attention was "...he must deny himself...". This is one thing that I certainly do not do! I want a new dress, I buy it. I want pancakes, I eat them. There is a common theme among all of this...want, want, want. What do I really need? I need to deny myself and not give in to the temptation of these desires. Yes, these things may seem small and trivial, but if this behavior is keeping me from growing in my relationship with Christ then I need to stop buying dresses and eating pancakes.Shopping and eating may not be sins in and of themselves, but if these tasks are fulfilling emotional needs, it is worth finding the root of where this desires come from. I don't want to be like the rich man in Matthew 19 that didn't want to sell his belongs to follow Jesus. I want to forgo my desires and live for Him.
Self-discipline is about holding your self accountable and making decisions about a healthy lifestyle. I need these skills, not just for me but as a way to follow Christ and grow in Him. I must deny myself in order to be like Him. He must become more and I must become less (John 3:30). This world is not about me and what I want, it's about serving Him and furthering the kingdom. Here's to incorporating more self-discipline in my life! Where do you stand?
